Happy Friday everyone! I wrote a blog post yesterday kind of reflecting on my therapy experience on Wednesday but it’s kind of blah. So I don’t know if I’m going to publish it or not. I haven’t really been inspired to write recently either which makes me kind of sad. I love to write, but I am filled with a lot of fear and self doubt these days. I’m afraid to share what’s really on my mind because sometimes it isn’t always bright and cheerful and I want this blog to be very positive and up-lifting. My brain kind of feels like a mess of emotions right now and I don’t want to waste your time as a reader to have to go through a lengthy post about all of the jumble in my brain.
Where am I finding my joy in the midst of all of this? I am trying to turn to the Lord as much as possible, however, a lot of times I feel distant from God. This morning I was praying and asked God to lead me to a passage for peace and comfort. It sounds crazy, but sometimes I just turn to a random page in the Bible and start reading. I feel very close to God in those moments. Today I read Isaiah 43 and it was just what I needed to hear. The verses that stood out to me the most were 1-2, “Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flames shall not consume you.”
I often feel like I am suffocating, but when I read verses like the one above I am reminded by God that I can breathe. I can breathe because I am His and He is there for me. The way my brain wants to read those verses is, “if you go in the water you will drown, the river will most certainly overwhelm you with floods, be prepared to burn in the fire and be consumed by the flames.” It’s so ironic that God directed me to these verses today, because it’s almost like He is trying to help me rewire my brain, no therapy necessary. He is reassuring me that all of my worrying is often unnecessary, and that if I place my trust in Him I will be fine. And that’s really all I want, is for everything to be fine. Thank you God for this much needed reminder, and I hope and pray that anyone out there reading this found it to be uplifting for whatever you are going through right now.
James and I are setting flight to go on vacation tomorrow night! I plan to still pop on the blog if I’m feeling inspired to write next week. I hope that you all have a wonderful weekend and 4th of July!
Talk to you soon 🙂